I took a deep breath and was about to touch the doorknob when someone opened the door already. Henry's face was the first thing I saw and his body blocked my way in. He was shocked to see me but smiled at me. "Oh, you're here?"
I smiled. "Yeah, aren't members here to attend the meeting?"
"Oh, you... agreed." Yeah, 'cause do I have any better choice? Nothing.
I nodded so he moved aside, letting me in, and gave me a chair. There were three chairs except for the swivel chair where Val was sitting while sipping his whiskey on his table. I sat on one of them that Henry gave me and figured out why are they aren't starting the meeting if we weren't waiting for anyone anymore? Or... is there one?
Henry was about to sit on his chair when the door opened and Shirley came in. Our eyes immediately found each other and if Val didn't clear his throat, it would be a staring contest again between us two.
Henry then stood and said, "I'll just take another one. You can sit on my chair."
Shirley, on the other hand, just rolled her eyes and didn't do as Henry said until he finally came out of the office. She went silent for a moment but slowly walked into Val's table.
"Hey," Shirley's soft voice rang on my head as she touch the table carefully and leaned on it.
I saw how Val's hands were tightened under the table and I immediately looked away when our eyes met. My heart almost leaped out of my body when I suddenly heard a cracking sound of glass. I looked at Val and was stunned when his left hand was full of blood and the glass was broken on his hand. Did he just break the glass using his hand? Is that how strong he is? Gosh!
"You wench! Are you just going to sit there and watch your boss die—?" Shirley suddenly shouted at me while she was carefully wiping his hand using a tissue.
But he cut her off. "What the fuck are you talking 'bout? Do you think I'll easily die because of this small shitty wound?" He glared at her and Shirley didn't move for a second. "Fuck off." He swayed his hand out of her hands and stood up. He went to the restroom and we were left saying nothing.
I looked at Shirley but she glared at me and grabbed me by my collar. "If you can't do anything about your boss, bleeding in front of you, better quit now, you useless wench!" Then, she pushed me to the door. My back hit the doorknob and a bad memory came into my mind.
I was catching my breath while trying to open the door for air. When I finally came out, I leaned onto the wall and calmed myself.
Not long enough, Henry appeared with a chair in his one hand as if it was just a piece of chips and was not heavy at all. His eyebrows frowned when he saw me outside but smiled before he asked. "Why are you here outside?" He put down the chair and walked closer to me. He touched the doorknob and was about to open it when my hand automatically moved and stopped him. He looked at my hand before paying attention to me. I immediately took my hand from his while he put his hand away from the doorknob.
"Why? Are they..." he asked and my face heated when something dirty popped in my head.
I looked away and silently pinched my legs. "N-No, it's not what you think. They're just... uh, fighting."
I heard him sigh which made me look at him. "Again?" he whispered before walking and carrying the chair again. He just put it beside me and gestured me to sit so I sat.
My eyebrows frowned at what he has said. Again? So this wasn't the first time? Well, lovers really fight sometimes but really? By his tone, I think it happens every day.
"For us, it was already normal to see them fight every day. There is no day that they didn't fight whether because of small or big things. But it was more often because of Val's mood swings. It may be unusual for other people but I was already used to him since it was already been years since I was working for him. But those long years, no one dared to ask him about his feelings or why was he like that because who would? Even though, I have this big and muscular body, when I'm facing him, I felt like my feet became jellies. He's always short-tempered so if I were you, I'd be really careful. I'm not trying to scare you, huh, I'm just telling you the facts you should know about our boss." He chuckled but he remained looking on the ground. "Honestly, I don't want you to be here. I don't want you to join us. 'Cause I don't want you to regret it all."
He stood properly and glanced at me. "So if you change your mind, quit."
I didn't say anything and we were just staring at each other. No one dared to cut the connection between our eyes, between us.
If only I could do that. If only I could be selfish this time. If only I could forget about them and just care about myself. If only I could run away from them—from the chaotic world and live happily in a quiet city. If only I could... I would definitely do that.
But I can't...
This isn't just about myself. My life isn't just the only thing in the line, my parents' lives too. Despite everything that they did shits to me, I couldn't just betray them for my happiness and satisfaction. My conscience wouldn't be able to handle all of that. After all, he—my brother—didn't teach me to be like those bad guys. He always reminds me to be selfless and forgiving even how bad those people did to you. Because in the end, it's not you who would feel so guilty for what they did to you, it's them.
So if this was the only way...
"I won't. No."
"What?" He seems confused when his senses got back.
"I said, I won't. No. I won't quit." He stayed silent while looking deeply into my eyes. "I won't change my mind, I won't regret it all, I... won't quit."
The silence went in a while but suddenly broke when we heard a loud noise from the inside of the office. Henry immediately opened the door and they saw how messy the room was. Val was standing and breathing heavily while standing at his table. Shirley, on the other side, was covering her face and sitting on a chair.
Henry attended her and I was just standing behind the door while watching them all messy. It was so satisfying to see your enemies be this messy. And the fact that they are nearly going through a war against each other was just... pleasing to the feeling. That should be what I'm feeling right now but... what's wrong with me? I can't feel that happy to see them break apart. I can't feel the happiness to see them fight against each other. I can't feel the happiness to see them defeated even without me trying so hard to fight because they were already defeated by their own allies. Why the fuck am I feeling this?!