"I'm sorry, I'm just glad you're awake."
Agad kong naramdaman ang hilo kaya napahiga ulit ako. I groaned.
"I-I'll call the doctor."
Ano bang nangyare? The last thing I remembered was crying in my house. What happened? How did I end up in here an hospital again?
"Why are you happy?" I opened my eyes when a eerie voice whispered.
"Why are you happy?" It said again and I looked around but I didn't see anyone. Fuck, my head hurts so bad.
"Did you forget about me?" A child voice made my skin crawl.
"Who—AAAAHHH!!" I shouted when I saw child sitting at the edge of my bed. Duguan ito at nakatingin ng mariin sa akin.
"Why did you leave me?" She cried and slowly crawled towards me.
"No..no..stop!" I cried out.
"Why did you let them kill me, Safahara?" Her bloody face came closer and my heart sank when I realized it was Maria. The child who died infront of me.
"I-.." My throat went dry. All I could do was cry.
"Please, stop.." I curled cowardly. "I'm tired. Please." Hagulhol ko.
I didn't really realized what happened next. Many people came in my room and checked on me but all I did was stare at them while crying habang walang imik. Samuel looked very worried.
"Callie!" Pumasok ang tatlong tao sa loob matapos ang pag check up ng doctor sa akin.
I didn't bother smiling at them.
"Samuel told me he found you unconscious in your bathtub. Callie, ano bang iniisip mo?! You could've died! Kung di lang tsismosa yung kapitbahay mo, hindi niya malalaman na nilulunod mo na pala sarili mo! God Callie! Are you out of your mind!?" He hissed.
I looked at him with weary eyes.
"Why did you let me live?" I asked. Maria is still there, looking at me with those bloody eyes while sitting beside Samuel.
"Why? Why did you save me!? Let me die! Just let me die already!" Tinulak ko siya ngunit sa sobrang hina ko ay hindi manlang siya natinag.
"Please....pagod na ako.." I clinged to Denzil. Walang umimik.
"Pagod na pagod na ako. I want to die." I sobbed and Denzil just hugged me.
"Shh, it's okay. It's okay. I'm here." He rubbed my back ngunit hindi nabawasan ang sakit na aking nararamdaman.
"Dahil sayo Samuel...dahil sayo.." I mumbled while crying. Sa sobra kong pagod ay agad akong nakatulog.
**
"Shh, she's waking up." I heard voices whispering to each other.
With a sense of deja vu, I slowly opened my eyes. Imbes na white cellar ang makita ko, isang kalangitan ang bumungad sa akin.
"Yan, gising ka na." Denzel's face interrupted the view.
"What? Nasan tayo?"
"Palawan."
"Wha—"
"Shh. We know how stressed you are, so we want to surprise you in this trip."
I groaned. Sobrang silaw. Nandito na ba kami sa palawan? How much days did I slept?
Rinig ko ang bulungan kaya napatingin ako sa cottage di kalayoan kung saan ako nakahiga, which is an open tent.
"Seriously? You want me to enjoy and you brought Samuel? Are you sarcastic or what?" Ani ako at tinaasan siya ng kilay. I saw Samuel, Joshua, and Trixie preparing foods.
"W-well, it's because I need to monitor Samuel. B-but kung di ka komportable ayos lang naman na—"
"Wag." Pinutol ko ang kaniyang sasabihin, "It doesn't matter. It's okay. I don't want to cause a ruckus."
He sighed, "Sorry."
I didn't look at him but instead, I looked at the peaceful see under the sunlight.
"I really can't do anything, my parents assigned me to be—"
"Denzel." I crossed my hands at him, "You brought me here without my consent and brought someone who traumatized me, do you think I would be happy to hear any reason?"
Tumahimik ito.
"But I'm not here to spoil anything. So I will pretend that I'm enjoying this."
"Callie.." His voice sounds sad.
Sigh.
"I'm really, really sorry." He said but I didn't say anything.
What's the point of saying sorry now?
Still, even if I'm mad, why is my heart beating fast? This is not normal.
"Trixie dito ka!" Parang bata yung dalawang kambal habang tinatawag nila si Trixie.
After the nonsense talk with Denzel, napagpasyahan namin na daluhan ang tatlo sa paghahanda.
Sinenyasan ko silang mamaya na at nilapitan si Trixie. Hindi kasi ako makatyempo kanina dahil lage akong binibwesit ng mga kambal.
Even though I feel awkward, I still want to enjoy this trip.
"Trixie pwede ba tayong mag u—" hindi ko pa natatapos ang mga kataga ko ng bigla niya akong niyakap, "Sorry! Huhu akala ko talaga you hate me na." She cried on my shoulders. Natawa naman ako and hugged her back.
Nakarating na kami ngayon sa isa pang island ng palawan kung saan kami mag s stay ng tatlong araw bago sila aalis ng bansa.
"Magpapasko na tapos aalis pa kayo." Singhal ko habang tinutulungan silang mag arrange ng meryenda.
Hindi ko muna binalikan ang kambal na busy sa dagat. Why do they keep sticking on me? Para akong may anak na inaalagaan. Denzel is okay, but Samuel is getting annoying. I'm trying my best to be friendly but sometimes I hate seeing him especially when he acts like he didn't do the worst to me.
"Sorry talaga, busy sa negosyo eh." Trixie sighed, "Pero uuwi naman kami next month." She added.
Napailing nalang ako habang nakangiti, they're so responsible and I feel so proud.
"Ayos ka lang ba talaga kay Samuel?" Bulong sa akin ni Trixie.
Nakatilikod si Joshua sa amin, busy sa pag ba-barbeque ng dinala naming baboy.
Tumango tango nalang ako.
Actually, I can see that Samuel really changed. Medyo aloof lang ako sakaniya dahil hindi ako masyadong komportable pa, but I don't really need to get along with him and they knew that.
"Hmm hmmm good good. Anyways sino nagbigay niyan sayo?" Nginuso niya ang keychain na nasa slingbag ko.
Uminit ang mukha ko ng maalala na binigyan pala ako ni Denzel neto kanina paggising ko.
"S-si Denzel."
"Uuyyyyy~ may kinikilig."
I rolled my eyes, "Me? No way."
**
"Truth or dare?" Gabi na, lahat kami pagod na sa kakababad sa dagat. Nakaupo kami ngayon sa bonfire habang kumakain at umiinom ng light alcoholic drinks.
"Truuuth~" i said, kinda tipsy. It's been a year since I stopped drinking beer.
"Ehem- except Daniel, may mahal ka ba?" Trixie grinned like a maniac and giggled.
"Hmmm," I looked around, they all waited for my answer, "Wala naman." Tawa ko but my heart is stinging. How could I easily forget Daniel? Hipokrita na ba ako neto?
Why am I thinking of another man when it's not been that long since my lover, my Fianceè died?
Sumimangot si Trixie.
"Wala pa..." Dagdag kong pabiro.
"Yie! HAHAHA spin the bottle na!" She exclaimed.
Himala ah, etong si Joshua ang tahimik simula nung magkasila ni Trixie. He changed, I guess.
I looked at Samuel at hindi na nagulat ng nakatingin din siya sa akin.
I guess people do change.
I drank the last drop in my cup.
"Denzel!! Truth or dare?" Tiningnan ako ni Trixie at kumindat muna. Denzel was not aware because he was busy with his phone at nung tinawag na siya, don lang niya napansin na sakaniya pala nakatutok ang bottle.
God, why is he so handsome...
Shoot! Did I just thought that? Damnit! Para akong palakira.
"Um, truth." Denzel smiled kindly.
"Hmm, is there a chance na maging kayo ni Farah?" Tukso ni Trixie. Uminit naman ang mukha ko sa hiya.
"P-pass."
Nanlumo naman ako ng eto ang sagot ni Denzel. Ganun ba kahirap sagutin yun? Sakit sa heart.
Wait what? Seriously? Is this because of the alcohol?
"Walang pass pass! Sagutin mo naaaa!" Pilit ni Trixie sakaniya. Napayuko naman si Denzel.
Nahihiya ba siya? Sabi ko nga ayaw niya eh.
"W-wala."
Aray.
"May iba akong gusto."
Double aray. Ang sakit.
"At ikakasal na kami."
ARAAAAYYY!!!
"Huh? Ikakasal na kayo? Kailan pa? Sino yan? Ikaw ha! Sumesekreto ka na!" Gulat na tanong ni Trixie.
"Kala ko si Farah gusto mo pare haha ang clingy mo sakaniya eh," Dagdag ni Joshua, "Tapos ikakasal ka na pala? Kanino?"
Para akong nabingi. Bigla kong naalala yung mga ginawa ni Denzel para sa akin, did I expect it to be something?
Anyways, how could I? I'm just his friend. Also, I had a lover not too long ago and his twin did something horrible to me. It will be a disaster if this feelings of mine will only get deep.
"Um teka CR muna ako." I excused myself at dali daling tumayo.
Tumakbo ako papalayo.
Did I just fall in love without me noticing it? No, that's too deep. I'm not an easy person. I don't love someone easily just because they show me kindness.
But what if...
I am? Shit. I'm going crazy.
"Fuck.." Napatigil ako ng sumasakit na ang dibdib ko at naghihirap na akong huminga, "Shet ang sakit." Tawa ko habang tumutulo na ang mga luha.
Napatingin ako sa paligid, nasa likod ako ng pinag s-stayhan namin. May mga cottage din naman dito so I decided na umupo muna sa isa doon.
I can't believe it..
I cried. I cried again.
Ang sakit.
Ang sakit talaga.
Akala ko ba crush crush lang?
"Hey..." Napaangat ang tingin ko at ang sinag ng buwan ang nagsisilbing ilaw upang makita ko kung sino ang taong nakatayo sa aking harapan.
Umupo siya sa upuan na nasa harapan ko, "I'm here, talk it out."
Napaiyak pa ako ng lalo.
Sa lahat pwedeng makakita sa akin sa ganitong kalagayan...
... at sa lahat lahat ng taong maiiyakan ko ngayon...
Hindi ko aakalain na isa si Samuel doon.