“You're stressing me, Helly!”
I simply wiped the tears that had been flowing in my eyes. Daddy's words broke me into pieces.
“Dad, let me explain! He is not and will never be my boylet—”
“I don't care! Just stop sticking to boys!”
I don't know why he doesn't want to hear my explanation. I told him nth times now that I don't have any boy lets as Dawn is just my friend but he didn't believe me. I heard that Ethann told Daddy that I escaped yesterday. I know that it's not right. I shouldn't leave him like that. I am at fault and I am willing to fix it.
He is just so very annoying. I don't have him on my side anyway so why bother to act like a weird bodyguard. He is not helping.
“He is just my friend”
But he just shook his head. Why does he seem doesn't believe his own daughter? Honestly, I am tired of this argument. I can't defend the truth as no one believes in me. Even my own Daddy. Is it that hard to listen to me?
“That boy of yours, that is just a piece of shit. If I were you, just focus on your studies so I will be proud of you! I gave your whims all the time but you're choking me, dear. Look at your cousins, they are successful now isn't it? That's because they are studying very hard and following their parent's paths! Unlike you! You are being a brat!”
I bowed my head down to hide my tears. This is it, I knew it. He really wants me to become a doctor like him. But how can I do that if I'm afraid of blood? of syringe? I can't be a doctor. All I just want is to become a teacher.
Yeah, my cousins are indeed successful now. They always made their parents proud. Unlike me, I am really stressed. This attitude that I have, being a brat, I want to grow my personality, and Daddy should lead the way. But how can he lead me there if he always scolds me? Can he just calmly hear me? He prefers listening to Ethann's shits.
“How can I make you proud Dad? How can I impress you if you're only looking at my bad habits? Look, Dad, I am studying hard too. I passed the last semester and I think that's enough? That is the least thing that my brain can do.”
He leaves a very heavy sigh as if he is so disappointed in me. I really made him mad. I wonder what if Mommy is here? Is she going to scold me like this too? She is so very soft to me. I hope she is proud of me now. At least, there's someone who's happy with what I achieved.
“Stop this drama Helly. Don't be dramatic.”
I sobbed. I know he is not going to listen and maybe I am just fooling myself forcing him to hear me. I looked like an attention-seeker daughter.
“Sorry, Dad.”
That is the only word that I can say right now. I just hope that he will forgive me after this. That I hope he will realize that he should be on my side. I didn't do anything wrong.
“Just stop being with other boys. Just stick to Ethann. This is for your own safety, Helly.”
I just nodded as I didn't have any choice. Be with the weirdest suitor ever.
Daddy opened the unit's door and walked out of the room without saying goodbye. He is disappointed and mad and that is because of my own ‘bullshits’ in life.

Me on the other hand, my plan on going out and having some me-time ruined. I ran to my room and expressed all of my emotions on my pillow under the comforter.
People want us to make selfish decisions. Keep on saying that being with someone you like is the happiest feeling so we should do it. Little did they know, it's not free to be with someone. You can spoil yourself but don't be selfish. Always look at what will happen to you if you'll do that thing.
However, the thing that I had with Dawn? It may be selfish but I don't regret anything. I knew him more and everything about him. He is a soft boy inside. His personality is like a microorganism. They can't be seen with the naked eye.
I sobbed and sobbed. Like, I thought Daddy is the proudest human alive of me. However, he is disappointed. He always told me that I should do what makes me happy as long as I don't do something wrong but why is it, he is mad now? Maybe it's because I didn't reach what my cousins achieved? So, maybe I'll just wish that I can be like them too.
Shannie, she is busy with their family gatherings. Yulla, she's busy dating her boyfriend and Dawn, he has so many responsibilities. And heck, I don't want to call Ethann. Never, over my dead and decaying cold body.
The whole day, I laid down on my bed. I didn't eat any meal. I am busy crying while my music playlist is comforting me. I can't call anyone. In this time of trouble, I only have myself.
I took a nap when I felt my tummy was vibrating. I am hungry and I don't know what to eat. I am lazy enough to cook and to order meals. Damn, I don't know.
I don't even have an appetite to eat. I just want to lay on my bed. I am feeling hot and heck, I am not even sweating. Good thing, I have a glass of water with me and it lessens the hotness I'm feeling. My lips went dry so I think, I am sick? Goodness, yeah right. People surround me didn't know that I have a weak immune system. I often get sick.
After I took a nap, I heard my phone vibrating out of nowhere. I look at it and—oh my gosh! I have 50 missed calls and 30 unread messages! And all of that came from him.
I immediately clicked the answer button and placed my phone in my ear.
“Hello…” I muttered in the weakest voice.
“Damn, I'm worried. Why are you not answering!”
I bit my lips which are really dry now. He's worried. I wish I could scream now.
“I took a nap. Sorry.”
“Open your door.”
My brows furrowed and didn't get him but I found myself almost flying just to open the door. As I opened the door, there I saw him in his sweater.
“Uh, hi?”
Instead of responding, he clenched his jaws and suddenly, put his palms on my forehead.
“Uh, I'm okay Dawn.”
“No, you're not.”
I bit my lips. So he saw it? He knew it. He closed the door behind us and faced me. I feel like my face is melting in red now, I am blushing. I almost screamed in fluttering when he ran his fingers in my brown hair.
I avoided his eyes so he can't see my bloodshot eyes caused by my tears lately. But he seemed to notice it because he immediately grabbed me for a hug.
I felt the warmth not because of the sickness but because of his embrace.
“I'm sorry…”
My forehead knotted. Why is he sorry?
“I should've been asked for your friend's permission before asking you to go with me.”
I shook my head to assure him that he's not at fault because, in the first place, I was the one who left Ethann rudely. I escaped from him and now, here comes the real trouble.
“No Dawn, it's fine.”
“Your Dad is mad, right?” he asked while playing with my hair from behind.
“How did you know?”
“Uh, I just knew that your Dad is your weakness, you won't cry like that if his emotions don't matter to you.”
I buried my face in his chest. My tears began to fall again. He 'hushed' me while I'm busy crying in the middle of his warm embrace.
“He is not that mad. Remember, he just loves you that much and he only wants your safety. He is one of the greatest fathers, Helly. Hopefully, you won't get mad at him.”
I nodded. Actually, I am not mad at Daddy. I am just crying because of frustration. He doesn't want to believe me, that's it. I am his daughter so I expected that he knew everything about me. That I can't do those stupidest things in life.
“Now, you have to eat. I know your stomach is empty.”
How come he guessed all of it. “How did you know?” Maybe, I am asking this question nth time now.
“I felt your tummy, it is thin but now, it has become thinner. You're hungry Helly. You need to eat.”
I was about to say that I don't have anything to cook but I saw what his hands were bringing from behind. A small box that I sensed was food. He placed it immediately on a plate and prepared the meal for me. He brought me fruits and I immediately felt like I'm drooling over them.
He joined me for dinner and he even insisted on washing the dishes. While I am, I am sitting on the couch and my body is not as it usually is. I really am not feeling well right now.
When he finished washing the dishes, he guided me to my bedroom and even fixed the bed for me. He laid me down and never in my wildest dreams I expected him to lay there with me. I immediately blushed at that moment.
He didn't think that maybe he'll get sick too because of going near me. Damn him.
Instead of asking me to sleep, he asked me what happened. The moment that I told him everything, I can feel that there's a part of me that feels well unlike lately. My feeling is not heavy now and the only bad thing I had now, I am sick.
He joined me there until I fell asleep. I felt his warm hug while I closed my eyes.
I am sleeping in his arms and hopefully, he didn't hear my exaggerated heartbeat.
“How about me, I am proud of you baby, go on and continue reaching your dreams. I'll root for your success.” I heard his whisper.