He can’t go anywhere, not with how fortified this place is. Escaping from here is only a pipedream. With that conviction, Brandon pretends not to notice the lesser demon’s critical gaze. And so the barrage of questions continues, each one trying to outsmart the other, like a typical game of chess.
“How can one go to Hell?”
Llearth chokes on his non-existent saliva. “A-and why would you wanna go to Hell? Most humans want to go to Heaven!” he shutters and stares at the half-demon like one would stare at an alien from outer space.
“I think it’s been established that I’m not a normal human. As a matter of fact, I am anything but human.”
“You’re not a demon either,” Llearth not so quietly murmurs. I don’t know what you are, but you’re certainly not just a demon.
“What did you say?”
“Nothing. I said nothing. What was your question again? Oh! I remember,” Llearth taps his head twice, “You want to know how to get to hell. Don’t you?”
“I wouldn’t ask if I didn’t.”
“How does one come to Earth?”
“Don’t bullshit me. That portal’s a one-way means of transport. Trust me, I’ve tried. Severally.”
“And then I start to wonder if what I saw in you at the beginning was wisdom or a random spike of sensibility in a default state of inherent idiocy and overwhelming bêtise. What a shame.” The lesser demon has a wistful expression on his face, like on who is lost in thought.
Brandon tries to reply with something equally as snarky, but a thought crosses his mind. He purses his lips and tries to make sense of the lesser demon’s words, repeating them in his mind, until it clicks. How does one come to Earth?
His formerly strained expression melts away to reveal one of realization. So that is what it is. No wonder,
“Ah,” Llearth remarks upon seeing the change in his expression.
“Just ‘ah’? not even a question or a statement to find out what id discovered?”
“You think too highly of yourself, tuakana[ Brother]. I’m honestly beginning to consider having Galileo check up on my nose, as you behave ore like a demon of Pride than a demon of Lust, which only serves to add further intrigue to your person. I don’t need the answer. You do. Whether I ask or not is of no consequence to me. Besides, I’m not stupid enough to use the same trick twice.”
Brandon gives Llearth a once-over, slightly surprised that his ploy failed. Given, it was quite obvious, but still, very few would not stumble due to obstacles placed directly in front of them. Perhaps he is more sensible than I give him credit for.
“Well, since you oh so graciously asked…”
“I did not!” Llearth argues.
“Whatever. I think that the same technology for coming to Earth works for going to Hell. I only have to reverse-engineer that technology and we have our ride back home. Voila!”
“Easier said than done. And who says it’s your home? I doubt you’d ever make it there alive and in one piece.” Llearth has a deadpan look, and Brandon wonders how the lesser demon can switch moods so quickly and just as easily. And he looks so natural. It’s hard to tell whether he’s genuine or not.
“At least pretend to be happy for me.”
“Why should I? You didn’t capture me to be happy for you, did you?”
Llearth’s words sober up the half-demon, reminding him of his main goal. Why am I so chatty with him? What is he doing to me?
He immediately uses his mind power to scan the entire room for any hexes, spells, or enchanted objects. He also requests for a scan, a task which Ultima swiftly carries out. Only after both scans yield negative results does he relax, but only for a while, as an even bigger thought assails him. Why then do I treat him differently from the others? What’s going on?
But he shakes his head thoroughly as if to stop his thoughts from progressing in a particular direction. I’m not falling for him. Never. I’m as straight as a meter rule. I’m just a bit lonely and sleep-deprived. That’s it. I’m talking more than necessary so that I don’t fall asleep.
With that conviction stuck to his heart like burnt food sticks to the bottom of the pot, he continues his inquiry.
“Who’s Galileo?”
“The only demon physician who knows his onions and actually treats messenger demons like real demons.”
“How do I create a portal to Hell?”
“That’s for me to now, and for you to find out. And don’t bother threatening me. Nothing mortal can pass through a portal and survive. You’d have to figure it out on your own. If you ever figure it out, that is.”
“Can demons have sex with humans?”
“Demons copulate with anything and everything. That is what makes our demons.” Llearth’s impertinent tone is not lost on the half-demon, but he does not react in anger. In fact, it bolsters his confidence and confirms his assumptions- his father is a demon. An unwitting smile breaks out across his face.
“Why do I feel creeped out, even though you’re just smiling?” Llearth’s question only excites Brandon the more, and he grins from ear to ear. The lesser demon feels warier. What the hell is going on?
“I’d tell you to consider it an honor to be privy to one of my hidden moments, but you’d never be able to grasp how precious it is, so never mind.” LLearth snorts at this.
“Can a human give birth to a demon?”
“Impossible! Totally impossible!”
“But…”
“Don’t ‘but’ me, mister. It is impractical. I do not know what you have read from those godforsaken, mortally corrupted books. But one thing I do know, and that one thing I can bet my life on- a human cannot birth a demon. Neither mother nor child would survive.”